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If he’s trying to convince you that he parties like a rock star and throws away cash like it’s Monopoly money, he’s probably just someone who isn’t responsible with his finances.

He thinks that the right combination of “gentlemanly” behaviors should unlock your legs.

He’ll pay for your meal, open the door for you and generally treat you like a princess. Reading his bio is like reading a cover letter for the position of “massive douchebag.” Without managing to list a single, actual accomplishment, he still describes himself as the kind of guy you’re not supposed to feel worthy of.

Rule of thumb: If a guy can’t specify the name of the company he started or his official role within it, he’s not a real entrepreneur. “Thinker.” “Visionary.” “Prophet.” Listen, dude, I know the economy is rough.He’s just an unemployed dude who watched “The Social Network” once and completely misunderstood the message. Plenty of us have been angry about the fact that our four years studying French lit landed us a barista job. You don’t impress anyone when you claim to be a great intellectual.No one — except for a few relatives every Thanksgiving — is judging you. You just give off the impression that you’re too in love with your own thoughts to be interesting to anyone else. There are plenty of genuinely nice men out there in the world. Are his pictures an endless series of mildly angry sneers? The vaguely annoyed look hip teenagers make when their parents crack a joke?Pictures of sluts that take selfies, and sexy girls taking nude selfie photos eager for sex.Slutty girls that send selfie pictures and sexy slutty girls with nude selfie pictures wanting sex.

Finding that special someone on Tinder is like looking for love at a party in your freshman year of college. Though I’m sure women have strategies for impressing men on Tinder, I’m a straight guy who doesn’t know too much about that.You have to put up with raging hormones, unstable personalities and more bullsh*t than you find at a presidential debate. I can, on the other hand, offer some advice for anyone out there who’s looking for a decent male prospect on Tinder.Generally, though, the ones who feel the need to point it out on their online dating profiles are still bitter about the fact that the head cheerleader wouldn’t go to prom with them five years ago. A guy who includes a candid shirtless shot in his pictures is probably OK. I’m talking about the dude who uses a picture he took of himself in the mirror, flexing his muscles, sporting the kind of faux-macho expression that shouldn’t be found outside of pro wrestling and action movies. He’s either uncomfortable with his masculinity, trying way too hard to show off his sensitive side or suffering from a chronic, unearned sense of superiority.If he’s proud of his physique and has a pic from his last beach vacation, he’s got every right to show it off. In fact, if you look closely, you’ll probably spot an oversized carton of protein powder with a ridiculous name like “MONSTER SMASH TRIPLE X!!! A date with him will be about as much fun as a trip to the orthodontist.Some men are trying way too hard to impress you on Tinder. Their pics consist of one or two grainy webcam photos in which they’re staring directly into the camera, wearing their least flattering “I’m about to go to sleep” shirt, looking more dead behind the eyes than Chris Christie at a Trump rally. There’s a fine line between tastefully sharing your success and posting the kind of images that look like stills from an amateur rapper’s music video.Their bio is no better, offering only the most basic of details: Height, age, race and some random quote about life/love/courage. If a guy gives off the vibe that he has a big bank account and good taste, there’s nothing wrong with that.