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This kind of pretense can include false modesty, politeness and courtesy... Narcissists surround themselves with sycophants and admirers; they want people to look up to them and envy them.The flipside of this is that narcissists have incredible envy of other people's successes.

In honour of February, while we celebrate all that's great about love, I feel it's important to also talk about what -- or who -- to avoid when it comes to matters of the heart.

Do you remember learning about the myth of Narcissus, the handsome man who fell in love with his own reflection?

He broke the heart of a mountain nymph named Echo and so the goddess of revenge, Nemesis, lured Narcissus to a pool of water where he saw his own face looking back and became forever depressed that he couldn't have what he wanted.

Today, this kind of self-centredness is called narcissistic personality disorder, named after the ill-fated Narcissus, and describes an undesirable character who is unfortunately rampant in today's society..in many people's relationships.

With all the pressure on men (and women) to succeed in business, in school and in life, it's no wonder that many people 'big' themselves up.

Society rewards confidence; it's how you get to the top. The narcissist is being fuelled by your compliments. Narcissists need to put you down to build themselves up. They won't like it if you're in a job that doesn't measure up to their standards, but they'll be even more upset if you're a success...But where does healthy confidence end and unhealthy narcissism begin? You'll start off giving them genuine love and attention for being the amazing person you think they are (or for the potential you see in them) and they'll love the compliments. there is nobody more skilled than you." But one day you'll realize that you might as well make a recorded message and play it to him because it doesn't matter who delivers these messages... And if you have some honest feedback or constructive criticism? When you date a narcissistic man or woman, chances are they're not going to shower you with the kind of love and attention they expect you to give them. because they're extremely competitive and need to be the best.How can you spot this behaviour pattern, and why should you avoid those who have it? They need you to constantly tell them (whether you mean it or not) "You are the smartest... The narcissist will turn on you, throw a tantrum or sulk like a child. They will make you feel like they're the boss and you're the protégé, that you need to live up to their extreme ideals of achievement and that they know better than you what you should do with your life.Narcissists believe they are the sun that everything -- including you -- should revolve around. But scratch under the surface and you'll find that's all you are to them... Do they only see you when it's convenient the star of the show. Some narcissists may tell you how to dress or wear your hair; they may even try to tell you how to feel!Dating a narcissist can be really exciting at the beginning. a sidekick, a trophy, someone to amuse and distract them. You're a part of their life, but are they a part of yours? They thrive on attention and require constant reinforcement. You tell them that they made you sad; they'll reply 'No, I didn't.' Nothing is ever a narcissist's fault.They're attractive, successful, charming, popular... They often behave how they think they should, not how they really feel.