After sharing a guest-post on step-parenting from the step-child’s point of view, one commenter asked an interesting question: “Should a man with no kids be hesitant to date a woman with kids?
” First, whether a man has children of his own or not, there is nothing wrong with preferring to date women without children.
While the age of the child plays a factor, if you’re not looking for anything serious, you shouldn’t play the “I’ll figure it out” game with a ready-made family.
Further, if you’re not a kid person or don’t want kids, you should not date a woman with kids to see if you’ll change your mind.
This is not a video game that you can turn off when you decide you do not like how the game is playing out.
That is a personal decision you should figure out long before you involve a woman and her child in your life.
However, there are a few things childless men should keep in mind when deciding whether they are ready to date a woman with a child, or children. Figure out if you like or want kids BEFORE dating a woman with children.
When you are single and looking to mingle, you generally will not hurt anyone if you start dating “just to see where things go.” Plenty of men do this all the time.But when deciding to date a woman with a child, you should be clear about your expectations for the relationship upfront with yourself and her.In other words, if you’re still in the “dating just to date” phase of your life, involving a woman with a child is probably not the type of relationship you should engage in because your actions will more than likely impact the lives of two people — the woman and the child.Save the games for the rest of the single people in the world who do not have the responsibility of looking out for the emotional well-being of themselves and their child. I’m always surprised at how few people discuss this topic upfront.Some women with children do not want any more kids, and this is an awkward conversation to have after you have already exchanged “I love yous” or “I dos.” If you want one or two kids and she already has one or two kids, this is a conversation you should have sooner rather than later.In addition, if you do not want any (biological) kids of your own, do not assume that just because she has one or more child from a previous relationship that she does not want anymore with you. As a continuation of the above point, one of the hardest changes for many single men who decide to date a woman with a child is realizing they are not in first place. This is a hard adjustment for many men to make because when you’re single and don’t have any kids, you can be as selfish as you want.