I reached out to the Nerd Love readership on Facebook and Twitter to answer some of the most perplexing frequently asked online dating questions.
One of the more difficult issues that people frequently wrestle with is: what are the rules when it comes to interacting with a match online, before you’re in a relationship?
Is it OK to track them down on Facebook before you’ve met? Is Googling them an invasion of privacy or simply a way of doing your due diligence before you meet?
Many sites have active forums and blogs as well as matchmaking services.
Ok Cupid spent years positioning itself as as social network as well as a dating site.
And yes, they may well be logging in to search for or flirt with other people. But the fact of the matter is: unless you’ve snagged their password, I completely understand the impulse to check and the anxious fear that they might decide to ditch you for this other person they’re meeting.
When you’re meeting someone in person, it’s easy enough to deliberately ignore the fact that they’re probably seeing other people.
When it comes to online dating however, it’s not hard to “accidentally” notice that UCLAGal84 has been logging into her account even after you’ve gone on a few dates.
It’s even understandable that you might feel a looking at other potential options. Of course, the big question is: are they flirting with other people?
Sure, intellectually you know you’re not exclusive and it’s far too early to even think about it. People log into their profiles for a number of reasons: to clear out old messages, to read messages from people who’ve written to them and say “no thanks”, to continue conversations with people they were talking with before.
Despite being more popular than ever, online dating still remains a potential minefield for social etiquette and self-esteem.
The “rules” of online dating are, for the most part, unspecified and unspoken and prone to change without any seeming warning.
What seems like a simple, intuitive choice can make the difference between a happy first date and echoing silence in your inbox.
And with the constant deluge of hook-up aps like Tinder and Grindr, alternative dating sites like Coffee Meets Bagel and Why Don’t We and non-standard sites like Meet Up, the do’s and don’ts of online dating get more confusing and convoluted than a Choose Your Own Adventure edition of here: to help you cut through the Gordian knot of online dating mysteries.