I was hanging out with a friend of mine in Brooklyn over the weekend, and he’s getting back into the dating scene.He was pretty stung by a woman nearly a year ago, and is finally over it.He and I got to talking, and I convinced him that for someone getting back into action, or who is totally new, internet dating is a MUST to get you going.
We decided that if we were going to call ourselves dating coaches, we’d have to know about everything related to the topic. It is always better to have a buddy help you set up your profile, as they will have a better idea of the strengths you should highlight. Mostly, you will have more FUN with a friend going through this with you.
So, we each picked a service (Nerve, Lavalife, Match) and posted a profile. Well, after I got over myself I realized that no one in the world really cares so much to check and see if I have an internet dating profile up, and even if they did, they would also have a profile posted so we’d be all even anyway. So, after a month or so of some pretty wild dating experiences, we pulled our notes together, and created a list of 5 MUST have’s for the ultimate internet dating advantage. You can share stories afterwards, even make up friendly competitions to encourage you both forward.
As you can well imagine, we found out some pretty amazing stuff. If you don’t have a buddy interested in doing this with you, don’t let it become an excuse. If you’re just getting back out there, mention that. In other words, endear yourself by revealing that you are human.
I gotta say, I was a bit uncomfortable initially in posting my picture online. You can always go to one of the dating advice webboards and find someone there but only if you’re really determined to get out in front of the competition. You’ve gotta have GREAT pictures to be out in front of the competition online. At some point in the course of the profile, you will be able to write a bit about yourself. No one is perfect, and guys who gloat and posture online about how much money they make, and how big their car is are sorted through like junk mail. Last but not least the first date is not a REAL date, OK?
I always recommend four, in these categories: If you don’t have these, that’s fine. What impression does this create in the mind of a woman? Be unconventional, and surprising, avoid the obvious. The first date is basically when you are introduced to the girl. So, keep your first real-life encounter short and sweet.
The idea here is to have four pictures of you in different environments/settings. I always like to ask girls out for dessert, after a dinner meeting (which may or may not be true, but NEVER take an online girl out for dinner when meeting her for the first time).If you need to enlist the help of a friend, feel free. This way, we get a low pressure way to meet-up, and can decide if we want to get together for a real date later on.Think of the first meeting as when you are introduced at a party.If you find that the conversation flows after the first awkward moments, then a first real date is a must.I had some great experiences in online dating and found it was a great way to practice social skills.I also met some really cool girls, and had a load of fun.